Pudgy wudgy was a bear

Baby chubb!!

I have to admit...I've never been a fan of chubby babies. When Jackson popped out at 10lbs 3 oz I was a little sad that I wouldn't see him in his newborn clothes for long. I knew he might be my last baby so I wanted to treasure the itty bitty-ness of him. Now that he's a whopping 13 plus pounds I've grown to love his chub and rolls. His little wrists have rolls. His back is pudgy and squeezable. I love it! Tonight I purposely left him in only a diaper just so I could cuddle and squeeze him in all of his naked glory. I love my fat boy!

Scary flashbacks!

A long 24 hours! It started on Tuesday (4/3). Burt was home cooking dinner and I was sitting on the couch with Jackson asleep on my chest. All of a sudden I felt him wiggle around and then gasp for air. I thought it was a bit weird but he seemed to be sleeping comfortably again. I then laid him in his swing and started to walk away when I heard that same gasping again. For a split second my heart dropped but then I had a light bulb moment. Maybe his nose needed to be suctioned. Alexa had a clear runny nose the past two mornings so maybe she shared some of her boogie germs. As I suctioned his nose he screamed and cried. By time I was done he was completely worked up and the gasping started again but much worse. Every breath was a gasp. This went on for a full minute. Another light bulb moment and I burped him. That seemed to calm him down a bit but the gasping continued only interrupted by repeated swallowing of air. I knew we couldn't let him continue on like this but I wasn't sure if it was serious enough to call an ambulance or to quickly drive to the hospital. If we drove to the hospital I knew Burt would have to come with me to keep an eye on him in the backseat. We quickly piled all the kids in the car and drove in. As soon as we got to the hospital they triaged him. His temperature was perfect. Great blood pressure and breath sounds. He seemed to have recovered his regular breathing pattern, but not knowing why it happened I knew he needed to be seen. They hooked him up to the monitors and watched him for awhile. His heart rate, respirations and O2 sats looked great for awhile. Then luckily when one of the doctors was in the room he had another gasping episode. Not nearly as bad as the one at home but bad enough to drop his sats to 89. At that point the decision was made to transport him to CHOP for observation. Burt brought the other 3 kids home to put them to bed. The ambulance came pretty quickly and after a crazy fast reckless ride there we were brought into the ER. After the usual checks they noticed his heart rate having PVC's on the monitor. They immediately did an EKG which confirmed this. As it was described to me, PVC's are when the heart's electrical system sends out a shock to tell the ventricles to contract before they're supposed to. Sometimes this is caused by low electrolyte levels. They then tried for 30 minutes to put in an IV to draw blood. My poor baby screamed and screamed. There's nothing worse then helplessly sitting next to your newborn while they scream out in pain. You can't pick them up and there's nothing you can do to soothe them. I tried the binky dipped in sugar water, shushing him, holding his arms close to his body, and rubbing his face with my finger. Finally when I was seconds away from making them stop the nurse got the IV in his left hand. Jackson calmed down shortly after I picked him up. His face was bright red and soaked in tears. I was completely heartbroken. How was it possible that I was here again with a sick 6 week old baby? Flashbacks of our many trips there with Alexa flooded my memory. I prayed that this was nothing serious as I sat alone, hungry, tired, and emotionally drained in the ER room until 5:30am. It was around that time that they admitted him to the Seashore house, room 410. When we walked into the room I was shocked to see we were sharing a room. Great! More germs! After another round of "What happened's?" we were left to get a little sleep. I knew I had to be up around 7:30 for rounds. I didn't sleep but maybe 10 minutes at a time. Every time I woke up and checked the clock it had only been 10 minutes but it felt like hours. When the doctors showed up they brought up two possibilities. First and most likely was that maybe while getting so worked up with the suctioning he refluxed and aspirated it causing him to choke and gasp for air. Second possibility was an asthma attack although no wheezing had been noted. The electrolyte testing came back normal. There was no explanation to the PVC's but I was reassured that they happen to people all the time and we just don't know it. The hope is that we just caught a random occurrence on the monitor and that his heart just resumes it's regular beating. They also assured me that the PVC's had no correlation to the gasping episodes. The doctors were confident after watching his stats all day that he was fine. We were discharged around 4pm. It was great to be home and cuddling my other babies too. Jackson's hospital roommate was a baby the same age as Alexa and it broke my heart listening to him scream every time the nurses came in. Children's hospitals are such a sad place to be. Being home with my rugrats was the boost to my mood that I needed. Jackson had no other weird breathing episodes. Thank. God.

6 weeks

The days seem to be running together this week, making it harder to keep up with these weekly posts. It's so hard to think back to the beginning of the week.

My precious baby boy, you have become so enjoyable. The smiles make taking care of you so much more rewarding. I still well up with tears every time you smile at me. You've begun cooing at us too. Every time I hear you I can't stop my mind from wandering and thinking about what your voice will sound like. I imagine the day when you say "Momma" or "Dadda" and I smile. I certainly don't want to rush these moments but I get so excited thinking about the future.

Feeding: It's getting more difficult to say exactly how much you're eating these days. Some bottles are 4oz and you're perfectly content with that. Others are 5oz and you suck them dry. We're still trying to keep you on an every 4 hours schedule but some days that's impossible. Growth spurt maybe?

Sleep/Awake Time: This week we started letting you spend time on your play mat. You don't stay occupied for long but it does give you a new type of stimulation.

Diapering: Still in size 1's

Clothing: Everything is getting a bit snug but I'm trying to hang in there with the size 0-3 month winter clothes. The warmer weather is right around the corner and I'd hate to buy another winter wardrobe in a bigger size when you have a closet full of summer clothes. I'm so excited to see your chubby little legs in shorts. This week I bought you a super cute one piece outfit that says "Crabby but Cute". Love it!!

Outings: Household errands have been the majority of our outings this week. We took a trip to KMart and Target to pick up candy and prizes for our Easter egg hunt. I even found an Easter basket for you that matches Alexa's. Now the two big kids have matching baskets and the two little kids have matching baskets. Other outings include a trip to Pathmark for food shopping where Mommy had to pull both you and your sister in a cart behind me and push the cart full of food in front of me. Fun times being the Mommy of two babies. This week the most exciting outing was your first trip to the zoo. You of course slept thru most of it.

Bath Time: My sweet love bug, I love giving you a bath now that you seem to enjoy it. You're just so relaxed. You love when I squeeze the washcloth full of water over your tummy. You squirm when I wash in between your toes. You're so ticklish.

6 weeks ago I was staring at my brand new baby boy. I was studying each and every inch of your body...memorizing your smell...trying to burn the sound of your cry into my brain. I never want to forget these beginning days but it happens. Inevitably. And some day I'll look at you and wonder where the time went. I'll shed a tear when I look at pictures of you when you were only 6 weeks old. For now I'll walk away from the computer and cuddle you. I'll kiss your chubby cheek and sniff your bald head and love every minute of it.

Smiles!!!

Nothing is more rewarding as a mom then the 1st time your newborn smiles. You go weeks and weeks with no acknowledgment that you even exist to them other then the crying and grunting to be fed and changed when all of a sudden they smile and you feel like it's all been worth it. You feel a new connection. One where you feel appreciated and loved. Jackson first smiled for Daddy on March 27th (5 weeks 1 day) and while I wish it was me, because let's face it I do most of the work, it was super cute to see. He had Jackson laying on the arm of the couch and was talking to him and making silly faces when all of a sudden his whole face lit up. He suddenly looked so different. He has two great big dimples! Since then I have been talking silly and in a very high pitched voice looking very goofy all in an effort to see him smile at me. While I thought maybe I saw him smile yesterday I know for sure that he did today. And now it's 4am and we're wide awake together and he's all smiles. I rub his cheek and his chin and he smiles super big. It's melting my heart! Being a stay at home mom doesn't give me a paycheck but tonight I feel like I just got paid.

5 weeks

Monday has come and gone and you're another week older. These posts seem to come quicker and quicker every week. I've decided that after six weeks I'll be writing them every two weeks instead of every week. It just seems as if things aren't changing quite as quickly as they did in those first couple of weeks.

Feeding: You're still eating 4oz every 4 hours but more often then not you are getting hungry after 3 hours. I've tried bumping up a few bottles to 5oz but you never seem to drink that much. I'm hoping you hold off on the 5oz bottles until Easter day as one of the things I have for your Easter basket is a couple packs of 8oz Dr. Brown's bottles. You've been spitting up more lately and it's definitely not my favorite part of motherhood. Changing my shirt a couple times a day because I forget to use a burp cloth to burp you is not helping the mounds of laundry I have building up. Sometimes you gulp your bottle so quickly that spitting up becomes inevitable!

Sleep/Awake Time: You've really been enjoying your light up mobile on your swing these days. If I'm lucky I can get in some cleaning time while you sit and stare at it. I've also been sitting (actually laying) you in Alexa's high chair. You seem to enjoy the change of scenery and the bright lights of the kitchen. You look like such a big boy sitting in there!

Diapering: Two words- Stinky Boy! That is all.

Clothing: This weeks warmer weather forced me to try on a couple 6 month onesie and pant sets and although they were a little big, you looked comfy in them. I'm finding that you can fit into Carters 6 month things but 3-6 months in any other brand are still huge on you. Luckily the more seasonable weather has returned and you'll get more wear out of your 0-3 month clothes.

Outings: This week we made a trip to the pediatrician for your 1 month check-up. You were amazing and super healthy! We also took a trip to Cutters Corner to get Nathan's haircut. This was the first time I got a "Are they all yours?" Yep. As a matter of fact they are! Sometimes I'm still shocked when I remember I have 4 kids.

Bath Time: I think things may be looking up on the bath front. You finally took a bath that didn't involve me worrying that the neighbors may think I was killing you. Sunday night Abby and I put you in the tub and you looked like you were enjoying it. You slowly kicked your little feet and laid there relaxed as I washed you. In fact, the only time you cried was when I took you out.

I am enjoying every minute with you. You're a fantastic little man! I <3 you Jackson Joseph!

4 weeks

Technically I suppose you're not a month old until tomorrow but today marks 4 weeks since your birth.

My sweet baby boy, you are becoming more and more adorable by the day and I fall more and more in love with you...if that's even possible. You're looking less newbornish everyday. Your puffy face and swollen eyes have been replaced with baby chub. You're peeling, flaking, dry newborn skin has been replaced with super soft baby skin. Your wrinkly fingers and toes are smoothing out and fattening up making them oh so kissable!

You have fallen into this family so very naturally and it's now like you've always been here. Adding you to our family has taken very little adjustment. Maybe it's because we already have a somewhat large family so at this point we're kind of at the "what's one more?" stage or maybe it's because we just went thru the baby stage with Alexa but whatever the reason you've been such a pleasant and easy addition.

Feeding: Your feeding schedule has stayed the same as last week and the week before. You're still eating 4 ounces every 4 hours for the most part. **Edited to add: Apparently your eating schedule is great because at your 1 month check up today you weighed in at 12lbs 5 oz. You've gained 1lb 7 oz in 16 days. You are now 23 inches long.

Sleep/Awake Time: Everyday your schedule seems to get more and more concrete although I know that will change often. Generally you wake up at 7:30 and stay awake for a few hours. You have a fussy period everyday around 10:30 and the only thing that makes you happy is to cuddle with Mommy. Once I get you back asleep you sleep off and on until 5:30 when you again request Mommy's undivided attention. When you're awake and fussy you love laying on your belly on my chest or laying in my arms walking around. Sometimes you enjoy just laying on the couch staring at the light. When your extra fussy I try to remind myself that one day soon you'll be pushing me away and crawling off. This helps put things in perspective and I can forget about all the things I'm not getting done and focus on spending time loving on you.

Diapering: I'm happy that we're getting into the last pack of size 1 diapers. I'm fairly certain that the next big box we buy will be size 2's. You have not yet outgrown the size 1's but I can see where they're starting to get tighter.

Clothing: This week's dilemma has been thanks to Mother Nature. We've had a crazy warm winter and now spring seems to be looking more like summer. This week they're forecasting highs in the 80's. When I bought clothes for you while I was pregnant I didn't factor this in. I bought a warm snuggly snowsuit, plenty of long sleeve onesies and crochet hats all in size 0-3 months and although you're a big boy you are no where near big enough to fit into the 6 month size summer clothes. Instead I'm just going to put the long sleeve onesies on you without pants and pray the more seasonal spring weather returns. Who wants summer weather in March anyways?

Outings: This week we've been little homebodies. I've enjoyed catching up on housework and even getting a little time to work on bows for the craft show. Your older brother and sister have had early dismissal at school all week and I'm still not at a point where I "enjoy" taking all four kids out in public. It's not that any of you act crazy it's just more work...physically and mentally. Last week I even forgot Abby in the house when we were leaving to go pick Daddy up from work. I didn't realize she wasn't in the van until I snapped your car seat in and looked in the back seat. Oops! For now I try to do all of my errands when it's just Alexa, you and me.

Bath time: Bath time is still a bit dramatic for you. You spend 95% of the time flailing your arms around and screaming. This continues on until your completely dressed and cuddling in my arms. After your last bath I noticed you were getting little pimples and dry patches on your face and head. I'm beginning to wonder if maybe you just have extra sensitive skin there and that maybe I should switch you to a perfume free soap made especially for sensitive skin. I've added powdering the little rolls of fat on your neck to the getting dressed routine. You smell oh so babylicious!

Your eyes, my baby, are looking more and more like they're going to be brown. In some lights I see blue in the outer iris but mostly brown. I'm a bit sad about this as I love blue eyes but happy that you have some of my features.

I'd like to have it here, on record, that I think you may be a finger or thumb sucker. None of the other kids have been but you have taken to sucking on your hands. You enjoy that more then you enjoy your binkie. In fact sometimes when I put the binkie in your mouth you make angry faces at me as you use your tongue to push it out. I'm so excited to see the little man you become but I must remind myself to enjoy the now. Happy 1 month birthday Buh-eee!!

21 months

So the birthday countdown has begun. Only 3 more months and my baby...I mean big girl will be 2 years old. Where has the time gone?! I've been wracking my brain these past couple weeks trying to decide what party theme we should go with. On one hand she is obsessed with Yo Gabba Gabba and watches at least one episode a day. There are all sorts of fun Gabba themed party goodies out there that would make that theme a hit. On the other hand she is also mildy obsessed with dogs or "goggies" right now. A doggie themed party would give me lots of creative freedom and would be tons of fun to do. Hmmmmm. Either way my party board on pinterest has become quite busy.